please help

[crazyt8]

Hello, I'm new but really don't know of where else to turn. I have some very serious issues going on in my life right know. I have just recently started trying to get "back on the boat" with the LORD & I have been forced to deal with alot of things I'd rather just forget. For starts I am now a single mom of two little girls. I have been married twice with neither marriage lasting more than two weeks then the men decided they couldn't handle the responsibility. My last marriage was more of a quick mistake. I had been with my yougest daughter's dad for about 4 years (never married) & we split up for a while because my oldest daughter's dad was released from prison & we thought we should try our relationship again. we jumped up one morning & decided to get married- 13 days later he moved out & said it was too much for him. So anyways after the divorce me & Craig (my yougest daughter's father) got back together.  :'(He died about 6 months later (april 1 2005) we came home & I found him in our yard not breathing- my daughters were in the car watching as I tried doing CPR, but anyways so my youngest child lost her daddy to a massive heart attack at age 2 & she's still terrified of ambulances & police. Well afterwards my last ex-husband- & my oldest daughters father--DJ-- came back into the picture. [He is her biological father but wasn't on the birth certificate because he was in prison when she was born.]   We were together again until recently & he said he didn't want the responsibility & left again.    He's been in & out alot & I'm really trying hard to move on, ALONE ,(which is very hard ) with my kids & trying to get closer to the Lord so I won't feel like I must have a man to live. I know they deserve alot better, but I also feel that they need a father in their lives. The latest event has really got me down-  when after only 1 week of not seeing & talking to DJ he comes over & curses me out & tells me how good he's doing with his new girlfriend he just met & says he's gonna try to take my daughter away so he can keep her and raise her. Plus he called me just tonight to tell me about his newest addition ,a baby boy, being born this morning to a girl he met in California & got pregnant. I really don't feel that he will ever be responsible enough or even ever care about me or his oldest daughter but I'm really having alot of problems with him harrassing us & always coming back around when I'm trying to do better. I just really feel like the harder I try to do right & try to follow the Lord & teach my children the Bible the more "crap" seems to go bad & wrong. I was just wondering if anyone had any advice or words of wisdom. Also another thing I was wondering is if i will ever even be allowed into Heaven since I have sinned so much. I know the bible says there is no such thing as divorce & you are only suppose to have one partner forever or it's considered one of the biggest sins- adultery- If this is the case then does that mean I might as well just give up & prepare to go to hell Please help if you can

[bishopbiscuits]

Dear Crazyt8,

.........Welcome to Deep waters  

Isaiah 1:18 - Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.

....... You did not use up all of God's grace and mercy towards you by whatever you may now hold yourself accountable for, including divorce.
......The one thing that I do know, is that you are not doomed by your past! No one is.

Romans 8:38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, 39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

.......The challenge is to not lose your hope for the future while in your present struggle.  And to choose to let patience have its perfect work in you. 
.......There are others who can speak from their testimonies to address more specific  areas of concern. But I just want to encourage you to not give in to an attitude of defeat. 
.......I will keep you lifted up in prayer.  You can make it!!  I believe you will, if you hold onto God's hand.   

[pressingon]

Hello

Romans 8:1-2, Amplified Bible

"Therefore, there is now NO condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, who live and walk not after the dictates of the flesh, but after the dictates of the Spirit.  For the Law of the Spirit of life which is in Christ Jesus has freed me from the law of sin and of death."

I just wanted to encourage you my sista.  No you are not condemned to hell for getting a divorce or anything else you may have done.  Thank God that His grace is sufficient.  I too am a divorced single mom.  I was seperated for 2 years and I've been divorced for 6 months.  I've gone through the world-wind of emotions that comes along with it.  So I speak from experience.  God can/will/and wants to restore you.  He should be your 1st and most Greatest Love.  You can be whole in him.  Right now just focus on your relationship with God.  Read your bible, pray, get in a church where the Word is being preached, and take care of your precious babies.  Also when possible have someone take your little ones and just spend some quality time doing something special for yourself.  Being a single-mom is not easy.  Don't worry about your children not having a full time father in their life.  You just be there mom and trust God because he's a father to the fatherless. 

And my sista, of course since you've been trying to do right the storms are raging.  The enemy wants to take your focus off God and put it on your circumstances.  My ex has a new child that he conceived while we were married.  The enemy tried to use that to tear down my self esteem.  But I thank God that he's rebuilding it by showing me just how special I am to Him.  In fact for my daughter's birthday.  We all (Her father, new girlfriend, new child, and some of my family) went to the amusement park together.  I was able to experience scripture come alive.  Philippians 4:7 "And god's peace which transcends all understanding shall guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus."  I never thought I would be able to do something like that before.  I still can't fully understand or put it into words.  But I know now that God has healed my heart.  There is no more pain.  He can do the same for you.  I don't have much time and there's so much I want to write because I've been there.  Feel free to send me an email plite4u@yahoo.com or PM me if you want to.

Also remember, God causes all things to work out for your Good.  It might not seem like it now.  But you will see  in the end.

I will pray for you and your girls.  God Bless.  Pressingon

[anotomy]

Everyone knows at least one divorce horror story, but we seldom hear about people who have established friendly post-divorce associations with each other. "Did you hear that Hugh and Liz are getting along well these days?" just isn't news. Armed with their version of divorce hell, the skeptics tell us it's impossible for a divorced couple to make peace and become friends. They outtalk the quiet and peaceful believers -- perhaps because people who are doing just fine don't feel the need to vent. "If every divorce were a 'War of the Roses', there would be blood on the streets.

[biscuit]

Everyone knows at least one divorce horror story, but we seldom hear about people who have established friendly post-divorce associations with each other. "Did you hear that Hugh and Liz are getting along well these days?" just isn't news. Armed with their version of divorce hell, the skeptics tell us it's impossible for a divorced couple to make peace and become friends. They outtalk the quiet and peaceful believers -- perhaps because people who are doing just fine don't feel the need to vent. "If every divorce were a 'War of the Roses', there would be blood on the streets.

Starting life agin after divorce is never easy. And I would love to know how things are now with you areyour girls. When we accept Christ as Lord & Saviour of our life we are covered by the blood of Christ and the blood saves us from the wrath of God. Live in peace in Christ.

Bit in response to the post above I wanted to say that my divorce was hell, but after a few years of peace (call it distance/space perhaps) and we were able to rebuild a friendship - a distant one at that. However if I was ever in need I knew i could call him and vice versa - and have tested that and it was fine. The good post-divorce stories are out there but who's gonna be shouting about it in Christian circles?