internet help

[aimee]

I was wondering if anyone can tell me again, how to get history off my husband's computer if there is nothing in the history file?
I almost trust him.  I just got some response back from our filter that  concerns me.
Thanks so much.

[Forum Administrator]

Hi aimee and welcome to Deep Waters.  What filter and operating system (i.e. Windows 95, XP, Macintosh, etc.) are you using? This information affects how files are removed.

I believe my article on Trust Issues may be helpful to you. Have you discussed with your husband the response from the filter that concerns you? One way to rebuild trust is to openly communicate about those things that are of concern.

Another note re: removing computer history: keep in mind that when temporary and other internet files are removed there is no differentiation between good history and not so good history. I just want you to be aware so that if you do remove files from the computer it does not become a point of contention between you and your husband, especially if it's his computer.

If you feel more comfortable communicating privately, please feel free to send me a private message (click here. I'll be praying for you both.

[bishopbiscuits]

........Something you might consider is that some programs that are meant to help protect against spyware,  can be set to delete history items automatically when the computer is restarted,  to help protect the computer.  It is possible that this is the case.
.........Since I don't know what type of message  the filter sent you, I will not guess. Nevertheless, it is still up to you two to address any concerns. I'll keep you in prayer 

[David Dupree]

Hi Aimee,

I think I read your question a little differently.  If I read you correctly, you want to know how to retrieve information from you husband's computer that he may have deleted already. 

Well, I am not certain on how to do that, but you can attempt to use a few different Norton utilities that may work.  It is pretty common that deleting files does not necessarily erase the information from the computer. 

But do you really want to do that?  You don't gain trust by feeding distrust or mistrust.   You will never improve the relationship by feeding the distrust that you already have.  You can chose to work to improve your trust or you can continue to tear the little trust you have further down.  You can work to save/keep your marriage or you can assuredly  destroy it by sowing seeds of discord. 

If you found something in the filter that concerns you, then why don't you do as the forum admin. suggested and just ask your husband about it without accusing or being confrontational? 

dd