Children Playing House

[IEve]

My 5 year-old nephew told me that he and his 9 year-old male cousin have been playing "boyfriend and girlfriend".  In this "game" the 9-year old lays on top of him and "shakes".  He said the last time they played this game, his cousin pulled both their pants down, pulled his thingy out, and laid on top of him.  

I told my sister and she acts as if she could not care less.  So, last night I was talking to her.  She had put the kids to bed upstairs by themselves.  She was downstairs, two flights below working on the computer.  She said she could not watch them 24/7 and had work to do.  

I'm not suggesting that she tie him to her hip, just be more watchful.  She said she talked to the cousin and told him to stop doing it and that's that.  I'm so angry with her attitude.  I could slap her face repeatedly.  

[Jesaira]

Hello,

In my opinion this is a serious issue and one that needs to be dealt with strategically through prayer and in Godly wisdom.  I believe that this is a trick of the enemy to plant a seed in the heart of your nephew to confuse him early about his sexuality.  But the devil is a liar!  

When I was about 7 years old, my godsister always wanted to play "house."  She wanted me to be the wife and she was the husband.  At the time, I went along with her because I was afraid of her.  She intimidated me and so I let her touch me in the most inappropriate places.  This went on for awhile but I had a praying mother and one day out of the blue, she told me that I could not go over my godsister's house again.  However, I never told her what happened.   Later on when I turned 21, I dreamt about my godsister and in the dream she violated me, I woke up startled and angry but I later realized that I surpressed what happened to me as a child and that God brought it back to me becaise it was time to deal with it.  Why I am I sharing this -- well, for several reasons, I struggled internally as a teenager with my sexuality because I was violated so young.  I allowed her to touch me because of fear and imitidation, is your nephew passive?  Also, I realize that my godsister was being touched by someone as well.  You may want to ask God for insight into the life of the 9 year old because children perpetuate what's done to them.  More than likely, someone has touched or molested him.

Due to what I experienced, I do not believe it is wisdom to leave children unsupervised and it doesn't matter if it's girls with girls or boys with girls...too much can happen.  

I believe the prayers of my mother had a lot to do with the reason why I didn't turn out perverted.  I have remain chaste but the enemy tried to ripped me of my sexually purity early on....and truthfully, his strategy has not changed.  The devil is the father of lies.   I pray that God moves upon the heart of your sister and causes her eyes to be open.

In the meantime, I encourage YOU to wage war on the enemy through intense intercession.  Speak the word of God as you pray and make sure that when your nephew is in your presence make sure to leave a deposit of righteousness and purity.  Also, on a practical basis, when your nephew is with you, be more attentive.  Personally, I don't think they should be sleeping in the same bed.  

I hope this helps!

[ethereal]

IEve,

Please, please go to war for your nephew and his cousin! That spirit is not one that plays around!  A door someplace in that family has been opened and it MUST, MUST be closed IMMEDIATELY. The spirit of homosexuality is running roughshod in our lives. We have mistakenly "tolerated" it's presence, so now it's accepted. Redirect your anger toward the source, which is not your sister, it's Satan. Pray with and over your nephew and his cousin! If the enemy gets a foothold.... We have lost and continue to lose too many kids to this "way". It's time to get some prayer warriors in on this one with you! Anoint those children and your sister's house (if she won't let you physically anoint it, then you cover that house and the property that it rests on with the blood of Jesus.) Don't delay. Father, in Jesus name, we come to you on the warpath. We come to you fighting this spirit that has caused so much destruction. We appropriate the blood over those children, over their homes, family and friends. right now Lord, we come against demonic attachments, satanic influences, witchcraft, idolatry, whatever may have attached itself to this family. Lord we ask your forgiveness for any occultic practices that may have been delved into on this families' past. Lord any psychic readings, mediums consulted, incantations spoken over this family, we just crush and break them in the name of Jesus. Lord, give your daughter the words to say and hear the prayers of her heart when her mouth is shut. Lord let your Spirit take contraol in that family, right now. Touch the heart of the sister, LOrd. Wake her up to the danger that has invaded her home. Give her the proper dicsernment LORD. Forgive her Lord where she has left the chilfren to fend for themselves, where she has ignored the please of her sister, where she has allowed life to consume her in such a way as to blind her to the attack on her family. Do it now Lord I pray. Don't let one more be lost to this sick, perverted and twisted "death style" for there is no "life" in it. We thank  you in advance for the victory. Devil you are a liar and there is no truth in you. you cannot have these children, they are God's and they are ours. We rebuke every one of your tricks, schemes and plans. In Jesus' mighty, matchless and powerful name, AMEN!

[Forum Administrator]

Amen to all that Jesaira and Ethereal have said. IEve, INTERVENE and do it NOW!There are three things that greatly concern me. One is that your 5-year old nephew is being molested. Another is that his 9-year old cousin is the molester. And the third is that the mother of the child who is being molested is aware of the problem, but is not taking measures to protect against this behavior.

From what you've said, your sister is aware of this problem. I'm supposing (and correct me if I'm wrong) that her son told her about what is happening, someone else made her aware of the 9-year old's behavior and/or she saw the behavior with her own eyes. She needs to be aware of the severity of this behavior, that it is nothing to wink at or write off as the harmless curiosity of children that they will grow out of. There are countless numbers of individuals that were put on a path of promiscuity and sexual perversion from being molested as children. Even at the tender age of 5 your nephew's mind is being altered by what is being allowed to happen to him. Children have been removed from homes for less serious offenses than this.

Your 5-year old nephew may have made his mother aware of what is going on, and we know that he has made you aware of what is going on. Even at 5, he may sense that what is happening to him is not right, or as Jesaira has suggested, he may be afraid. Whatever the reason is for him letting you know, take it as a cry for help from a little one who is dependent on those who have positions of authority in his life.

I would suggest that you make yourself known to him as one who he can continue to come to and confide in. He needs to know that someone bigger than him and his cousin is looking out for his protection. Just as he has been open with you in coming to you, be open with him in addressing this.

One approach you might take is to invite him and his cousin to go out with you to Chuck E Cheese or some place fun like that. Disarm them with fun activities, then when they have worn themselves out having fun, sit down with them to eat and begin to converse with them casually. (Plan in advance the things you want to say to them, but make it seem as if you have not planned anything.) Let them know how glad you are to have them as family and then talk to them in terms they can both understand about how special family is. Tell them about all the things family can do together and while you're talking about what family can do together, interject clear statements about what family should not do together (e.g. be/act as boyfriend and girlfriend, hurt/threaten each other, force each other to do things they don't want to do).  Make a clear distinction between "appropriate" and "inappropriate" behavior (such as touching each other's "private" parts, laying on top of each other, pulling each other's pants down, etc.) between family members. Speak in general terms as if you've never heard anything about what is going on, but tune into their responses and body language. Have them both sit across the table from you, but try to keep your leg in between them (without them knowing it) so that you can be aware if there is any nudging or kicking that is attempted under the table. Try to ask open-ended questions to get them to verbalize and then affirm what is right thinking and correct what is wrong thinking. Be careful not to shame your nephew or his cousin. Do not prolong the matter, and once you have said all that you need to say (for then), switch the subject to something else that they both might be interested in (i.e. what they want to be when they grow up, or favorite games, etc.). Just before you switch the conversation, get very serious for a moment, look them each in the eyes and adress each one by name and tell them one by one that if anyone in the family ever does any of those things (that you have already stated as inappropriate) that "it is not right" and let them know that they can come to you at any time and let you know about it. Before you drop them off give them each a big hug, and tell them that you love them. Become their accountability and "safe" person that they can come to. Follow-up with them periodically and make sure the behavior has not continued. If necessary, keep a standing "date" with them so that they'll know that you are involved in their lives and mean what you say.

Your sister may be responding out of frustration. She may not know what else to do. Help her. Remember a soft answer turns away wrath. Go to her again, and with an attitude of love and kindness, try to help her to reach a full understanding of the severity of what is going on. Let her know what she is doing right. Let her know that you are on her side and that you don't want her or your nephew to be hurt in any way. Gently remind her that even though she has told the 9-year old to stop what he's doing, he has not stopped and it is her son that is being hurt. Let her know that this behavior does not go away on it's own; it escalates.

Your sister does not have to watch the children 24/7, but as a parent she does have to supervise. God, her son, and the state will hold her responsible for her child's safety and well-being. Here are two practical safeguards that she can put in place immediately: 1) the children should never be left alone together unsupervised. If they are playing together, they should play downstairs in the same room where someone else/she is; and 2) they should not be allowed to sleep together.

I agree with Jesaira that the 9-year old has been exposed to something himself. He is acting out something that he has seen or perhaps experienced. It may be something he's seen on cable/magazine/video, witnessed in person, and/or something that has been done to him. The fact that he refers to "boyfriend and girlfriend" leads me to believe he is acting out something that is more personal to him. Children should not be allowed to see everything and it is our responsibility as adults to safeguard what they are exposed and subjected to. God will hold us accountable for this.

IEve, this is a very serious matter. God has allowed you to be part of this so that He can use you to help protect the lives of these children. God will enable you to do what He wants you to do. Remain prayerful. As you prepare to speak with your nephew and his cousin, ask God to help you to say what needs to be said, how it needs to be said, and to help you to anticipate and have an answer for any questions they might have.

[IEve]

Thank you all for your words of wisdom and prayers.  I have prayed.  I have prayed for both boys.  I laid hands on my nephew and prayed over him the last time he spent the night with me.
 
Sidebar:  Does anyone's hands get hot and turn reddish/deep pink at times when they pray?

I just remembered about six-weeks ago our church was having an altar call and my nephew asked me to walk him up so that someone could pray for him.  Of course at the time, I didn't know why?  Bless the Lord, my baby is a praying child.  He will take anything to the Lord in prayer.

My spiritual mother and I are beginning a fast this week.  Also, I do know that my little cousin has been exposed to all manner of sexual images from an early age.  

He watches BET and MTV religously.  Also, he has been allowed to watch R rated movies seen he was 3 or so.  You know R rated movies are even worse than they use to be.  Now, they are almost soft-porn.  He was bragging to the neighborhood children about all the movies he has seen.

[ethereal]

It's good that you've identified the source of the problem and now that you've prayed....keep praying & rest assured that others will be undergirding you and the boys.

As for the feeling in your hands: My Pastor uses the same description for what happens to him when the gift of healing is operating through him! Don't know if that's what is happening to you but...

[morefaith]

I may be late with my reply, but I am praying all is well in this situation.

Prayer is Power. No doubt, couldn't live without it.
HOWEVER!

You must do more than pray. You must do something and do it yesterday. These boys need help. Forget the mother. Go elsewhere, scream, shout, do whatever you have to do. ALL BABIES need protection no matter what!! Yes, pray before you act, then tell the sister and the parents of the other one if they do not get their act together, you will tell the family members and or call the authorities AND DO IT. This isn't a case of a child hogging toys. These boys are mimicking sexual activity, homosexual activity at that. The 9-year-old is obviously seeing sex or being molested himself. Yeah, Satan is busy but so is Our Savior! Let HIM act through you and save these children, please! There is a reason the 5-year-old came to you. Stay prayed up and TAKE ACTION!!!

I commend you. I would have slapped my sister silly! GOD BLESS YOU!!!