Signs of a Trustworthy Confidant

[Forum Administrator]

8 Signs of a Trustworthy Confidant
Seven Keys to Spiritual Renewal

1. Humility. Seek someone who doesn't try to impress people. Proud, self-righteous people are concerned about themselves and their image more than your needs and struggles.

2. A spirit of hope. A negative, fearful, or unhappy person can shadow all conversations with pessimism and woe. This kind of attitude can erode faith that's already fragile.

3. Concern. If someone competes with you or has misrepresented you, avoid him or her as a confidant. Find someone with genuine concern but who won't allow that concern to keep him or her from being honest with you.

4. Honesty. Flee from anyone with an agenda. If someone has something to gain by befriending you, keep looking. Along the same line, examine your motives regarding the person you choose as your confidant. For example, if your bad choices have left you on the verge of bankruptcy, a sudden urge to tell your troubles to the wealthiest person in the church probably indicates a hidden agenda.

5. Strength. It is tempting to choose a weak person as a confidant so you won't feel so bad about yourself. Avoid anyone whom you can manipulate.

6.Availability. The person in whom you confide should be available and your lives should intersect (at church, work, or school). Proximity will give him/her the opportunity to observe your behavior and confront you as needed.

7.Gender.  Persons of the opposite gender should be considered unavailable as confidants because unhealthy infatuations and emotional attachments are likely to develop.

8. Spirituality. Before you seek solace, encouragement, or direction from anyone, make sure he or she is a Christian. If you fail to do this, you'll be adding more confusion to your life than you're eliminating.