Deep Waters Relationship Advice

Hi, Gracious! It's five years later and I'm still enjoying reading your posts! Thank you for reading Cheer Up Your Wife and for your comments. I'm thinking maybe I should have asked you to write the book's description!  You've given me some food for thought with your comment about the book's relevance to sibling rivalry. That's an interesting perspective. I hope you're still out there and doing well. Peace and blessings!

Hi, 1EagleSky! I enjoyed reading your post and appreciate your insight and input. "Distraction can result in unnecessary delay. FOCUS on you and God's agenda for you." I love and agree with that!

I'm quite a bit late seeing this post. The forum was in an archived state, but there have been requests to get it going again. I am giving that serious consideration. What do you think about that? Should we dive back into Deep Waters? 

It has been a REALLY long time since I've posted on this site. Blessings and encouragement to all in this New Year of 2018.
I'm sure all of us are familiar with the expression, "Jack of All Trades, Master of None." This refers to people who know A LITTLE ABOUT A LOT OF THINGS. If your house needed a major repair job, in all honesty, would you give Jack full reign to repair everything in your house? I am sure you would say no, just do one or two repairs, get a professional to do the rest. If you were stingy enough to pay Jack to repair your whole house, I'm sure you'd be sweating bullets the whole time, lol!!! I find in my life experience as it relates to romantic relationships, I was a lot like that Jack of All Trades: focusing on whether or not he liked me as just a friend or something more, wondering why others seemed to never have relationship issues, money issues, etc, etc. I think at some point, we've all had those kinds of worries. Perfectly natural. The problem comes when we become distracted from developing who we are and what God wants us to be. Distraction can result in unnecessary delay. FOCUS on you and God's agenda for you. When you don't do this, it is like participating in a marathon, but instead of running, youstart focusing on how everyone is passing you by, instead of making sure you do all you can to finish the race. Professionals put all their effort into achieving a single goal. Jack of All Trades are unfocused and all over the map. Stay focused on your goal. Mr. Right will notice and pursue you! You won't have to call him, add him as a Facebook friend, get your friend who works with him to send along a message from you. It is a message many women of all ages don't want to hear, fearing others are being blessed with relationships while they are forgotten, but it's true, as true as 1+1=2.

Hello 1EagleSky. Apologies. This post had been overlooked all this time. Though The Vision Tarry is in the process of being reprinted and will be available on Amazon.com in December, 2013. Her latest release, Cheer Up Your Wife us also available on Amazon.com. If you have any questions, please send an email to admin@aleatheadupree.com. Thank you.

The other night, just before I closed my eyes for the evenin' ... didn't one of those ole' tv sitcoms come on! 



(As a child I remember my mother singin' that song ... how she luuuuuved that show!  And she would talk about the fact that that show was one of the few that would have Black actors as "regulars" on it.)

So... as I was sayin' ... that night before I shut my eyes, I heard that theme song & decided to postpone my sleep for 30 minutes or so.

This particular episode had to do with a couple who were dating - reached a point of passion (love) & all of sudden they both got scared & split up!  She didn't care for his controlling behavior & he didn't care for her mouth (endless complaints without compliments).

Huh, the more times change ... the more things stay the same?  "Cause I think we'd all be pressed to find anyone (young or old) that hadn't had that experience.  So ... I reached for the remote, off went the tv & to sleep I went.

That would have been the end of it had I not read some snippets from our Forum Admin's book!



Beloved, for any man seeking a wife, or for any woman desiring her husband ... preparation is EVERYTHING ... Amen!  And to me, this book will help position you closer towards that aim!

Sista' Dupree (a wife) speaks openly & honestly concerning the "truth"!  And yes ... it can be a bitter pill at times, but she speaks what God has shown her,  in love.  And I have followed her teachings since I've been here & am blessed for doing so.

She speaks about marriage in depth by asking & answering key questions like:

• What is marriage, and why do marriages fail?

• Effective communication

• Knowing how to fix the problem

Now, you may not be married ... BUT ... I implore you, don't let the devil fool you!  The SAME stuff you deal with when you are single (if left unchecked / fixed), will not only follow you into a marriage - that stuff will intensify.

This amazing tool works!!!   Why???  Because, we as a People (God's People) are consistently "evolving" & most of the time, if we're truthful ... we don't know about many of the issues that come up in us (out of our mouths even)! 

Have you ever said something unsettling to your love interest / your own child/ family member, or felt a certain unsettling way ... when around them & it was just as much of a shock to you ... as it was to them?



For me, THAT's what this book helps to heal!  Relationships, between husbands & wives - relationships between fathers & their sons, mothers & their daughters - sibling rivalry too!

I'm so sure that our FA may REALLY question the sibling rivalry part but trust ... I can attest to it!  Got a testimony & everything! The humane-soul is what the authors anointing has been divinely lead to help heal!  And all I can do is say "Thank you"!


PS
I kinda' think that God might have used the sitcom thang' I mentioned earlier, as a gateway?

With ... "Love, American Style"!

Gracious

Greetings Everyone,

Digesting the recent court's verdict concerning Trayvon Martin (murdered/deceased) and George Zimmerman has been bitter to say the least.  And has called many of us GOD fearing persons to fall on our knees, seeking answers from HIM, to try and make sense of that which makes absolutely NO SENSE AT ALL!!!

While on my knees praying firstly for the family of Trayvon Martin and then for all of the nameless in this country who've met a similar fate at the hand of Legal Terrorism ... I heard a Word from heaven! 

And here it is ...

There are many sleeping giants around us!  Giants that include "us", as in the GREAT EXPECTIONS that dwell in each of us no matter our race, gender or creed ... awakened only by & through our awesome CREATOR!

Over 40 years ago, a modern day Prophet surnamed Martin Luther King Jr rose from the smoldering ashes of Jim Crow, being born African American in this country and through the teachings of Mohandas K. Gandhi (aka Mahatma Gandhi meaning "great-soul" ) which included The Salt March of 1930 and became "the-face" of the Civil Rights movement within "this" country & around the world!

Towards the end of his life, Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. both organized/galvanized and began to saturate much of his works in:

Quote

The Poor People's Campaign / The Least Of These -
A Movement For Change!
Born of "The Crisis in America's Cities"
Memphis Sanitation Strike of 1968
(The deaths of Echol Cole and Robert Walker)

The 'Memphis Sanitation Strike' began on February 11, 1968 in Memphis, Tennessee. Citing years of poor treatment, discrimination, dangerous working conditions, and the horrifying recent deaths of Echol Cole and Robert Walker, some 1300 black sanitation workers walked off the job in protest. They also sought to join the American Federation of State, County, and Municipal Employees (AFSCME) Local 1733.

Echol Cole and Robert Walker, had been crushed in a mechanical malfunction on February 1st, 1968; city rules forbade black employees to seek shelter from rain anywhere but in the back of their compressor trucks, with the garbage.

Memphis's mayor, Henry Loeb, declared the strike illegal and refused to meet with local black leaders. (He did meet with AFSCME's national officers.)

The Poor People's Campaign was a 1968 effort to gain economic justice for poor people in the United States. It was organized by Martin Luther King, Jr and the Southern Christian Leadership Conference - SCLC, and carried out in the wake of King's assassination.

The Campaign demanded economic and human rights for poor Blacks, Chicanos, Native Americans, and Whites. After presenting an organized set of demands to Congress and executive agencies, participants set up a 3000-person tent city on the Washington Mall, where they stayed for six weeks.

The fact that Trayvon Martin an African American 17 year old unarmed child was murdered on that rainy Sunday evening of February 26, 2011, by a 28 year old man (of whom major media sources tout as being of Caucasian & Hispanic??? descent) & that man was not formally arrested nor was he formally charged for this murder until Apr 11, 2012 (some 14 months after he'd admittedly killed Trayvon Martin), speaks volumes concerning the legal indignity designed to further perpetuate racial injustice in this country. 

What took so long for Zimmerman to be formally arrested???

Well, it was only through the POWER of "righteous indignation", led & galvanized chiefly by The Honorable Reverend Alfred Charles "Al" Sharpton with a voice coming directly from and through Peoples of ALL races ... peaceably hitting the streets, protesting in almost every corner of this nation (with the world anxiously watching) ... calling for JUSTICE ... was Zimmerman FINALLY formally arrested & charged!

Sound familiar?

Again, History speaks ... 'Memphis Sanitation Strike' of 1968!

Initially, the mayor at that time (Henry Loeb) refused to acknowledge the "righteous indignation" coming from Peoples of all races. From many corners of this country, they entered this city to "peaceably protest" the deplorable working conditions of African American Sanitation Workers in Memphis.  Again, with the world anxiously watching, calling for JUSTICE; The SCLC & The Honorable Coretta Scott-King lead a silent march of over 42,000 Peoples (of all races) and FINALLY true justice prevailed!

Beloved,

The laws of this country were supposed to be designed to create equity & peace for this ever growing/changing populous.  However, what we've seen is quite the opposite; laws being made to protect evil, immorality & hate - laws protecting terrorism against certain Peoples of Color.

... "The Stand Your Ground Law"?

Just as in times past ... Jim Crow legislation laid the ground work for the horrific deaths of 2 Black men (sanitation workers from Memphis, TN) that few remember ... Echol Cole and Robert Walker. Two Black men who suffered dreadful anguish while being crushed to death!

WHY??? 

Because of LAWS (instigated by old Jim Crow mentalities) designed to protect the so-called rights of terroristic attackers against certain Peoples of Color!

Racism is a sickness designed to kill its target, steal the hope, and destroy all memory/HISTORY of its victim(s).  Racism is an infectious disease!  It rests in the spirit of men & women & eats tenaciously at the heart, leaving only the residue - the stench of spoil!

Approaching a possible Answer ...



Our Sword of the Spirit holds within it many questions and answers EACH of those questions.  We need only to be led by our supreme knowledge/wisdom regulator (The Holy Ghost) for divine understanding ... Amen?

As I'd referenced in an earlier post ... In the book of Joshua (1-12) after the death of Moses, the Lord came to Joshua with succinct instruction.  HE told Joshua how to "position" himself & his People to walk into their abundant destiny.  And Joshua obeyed HIM!  All of this obedience to GOD did not come automatically however.  There was a history of pride (original sin) among Joshua's own People and it was only after his People were pushed to the point of ... "No More!!!" ... & left with little choice BUT to follow him, was Joshua able to lead.

Sound familiar???

For today, certain Peoples of Color have wandered & walked around this mountain of racial degradation and we have had enough!  Everything within is shouting:

"NO ... NOT AGAIN ... WE'VE FOUGHT THIS FIGHT BEFORE! ... TOO MANY OF OUR BEST & OUR BRIGHTEST HAVE DIED AT THE HANDS OF HATE ... TERRORISM AGAINST OUR PEOPLE ... SHALL ... CEASE!

It is they who've been labeled "The Poor / The Least Of These"/the defenseless among us, that  always appear to suffer the most.  Can you imagine how many of us, died with no name (no one knowing or caring who they are ... the homeless) - their hope lost? The only way we'd even know they'd existed is because their residue looks vaguely like one of our own family members???

When you've been LEGALLY restricted/ driven into and confined by poverty, your legal rights (Human Rights) are defined by the hate of your perpetrator!  When you are labeled as a target BECAUSE of your race in THIS country - no matter your station ... the enemy will do his very best that you be caricatured into the stench of old stereotypes!

We know this, yet there is something within the Holy-fiber of our being that has NEVER accepted this!  And it is because of "Joshua's Might"  carefully imbedded within each of us, that we remember those murdered at the hands of terrorists - against us & we label our hope for tomorrow by saying that:

We remember ... Trayvon Martin!!!



As we peacefully hit the streets, we are carefully admonished & governed by the 6 points of non-violence - taught us by our Prophet, The Honorable Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., in our demonstrations!

These recent events have awakened the sleeping giant within and as we revitalize, we ANSWER ... injustice boldly with this decree:



Now, if by chance you find yourself feeling completely detached from the "poor, the least of these and or a movement for change"!  Please know, that if ever in your life, you have found yourself unjustly dealt with because of the color of your skin, because of whom you've chosen to love or even because of your economic station/status, you have been spiritually enjoined with "THE LEAST OF THESE" and the Holy Bible speaks directly in this way ...

Jesus The Christ answered HIS questioners in Matthew 25:40 by simply saying:

  As our nation grieves the loss of Trayvon Martin & reel at the "not guilty" verdict, there's something to keep in mind that directly relates to singles. Trayvon's life was lost based on a stereotype one man, and a hotheaded one at that, had of him. How many of us singles are guilty of doing the same thing to people we meet? Writing them off as being uneducated, lazy, thuggish, a major league baby mama, deadbeat Dad, etc., when in fact, your preconceived notions are so far from reality. I believe far too many of us singles miss God's blessings for us because of this. I don't necessarily mean a boyfriend or girlfriend, or marriage. Sometimes, God will bring a person into your life to heal past hurts just by being a good friend to you. Others might be the catalyst to open doors of financial or employment advancement to you. Some may help you grow spiritually, or get back on track if you've fallen away in your relationship with God. Trayvon lost his life. You may lose a whole lot more by being judgmental without reason.

Beloved,

Yesterday I saw & heard something that truly puzzled me & I'd like to share it with you.  While watching the news, a pundit came on the air and said: 

"... Now concerning the Trayvon Martin case - this just in ... George Zimmerman (accused in the murder of Trayvon Martin, a seventeen year old African American male) was found not guilty on all counts & after processing, is a free man ..."

Strangely, I was not surprised. I mean George's fate was in the hands of 5 Caucasian women and one "possible" person of color?  And in this country pervasively the word justice with reference to the court system - excludes certain Peoples.  Who are these "People's" you may ask?  Answer:  "JUST US"!!!

Of course, we can "Monday morning quarterback" this thing, beginning with the ineptness of the prosecution's council.  But I believe that the outcome of this trial was decided before the proceedings began!

The morning after I heard the jury's decision, I went to GOD in prayer, trying desperately to extrapolate the meaning of it all ... Why did Trayvon Martin (may God rest his soul) have to die?  When all Zimmerman had to do was STAY in his car AND - OR to heed the direction of the 911 operator, stop his pursuit of Trayvon Martin, go back to his car & wait for police assistance!

How are "we" as a People - living "IN" this country, to digest this bitter pill?  How many times past have African American boys & men died innocently at the hands of Caucasian men with an obvious axe to grind concerning African Americans ... MALES in particular, simply because of the color of their beautiful brown skin?  Is THIS the year 2013 A.D., or have we digressed to 50 - 450 yrs prior?

The morning after I heard & I saw the news, I remember also seeing Trayvon Martin's mother on the television.  She held within her countenance the epitome of grace, class & resolve.  Sort of what you see when God calls & elevates you to a specific history making task!  A task that appears to cost you EVERYTHING ... with a pressure that seems waaay too much for one individual to bear!

Because we as a People in THIS country, have become so accustomed/immune even) to the obvious dysfunction held within Caucasians towards us & we them, there appears to be an invisible deadly force that swells in our spirit, corrupts and eventually erupts!

Today, it appears that rather than relive the successful solutions of our past towards injustice (galvanize, hit the streets - march - become a "political" power force within our OWN individual communities) we'd rather unjustly kill ourselves AND allow other races to "unjustly" kill us!

I'm led that the fight the devil has for us is amongst us (bickering over woulda'/could'/shoulda'attorney mishaps & the like) ... Amen?

Yet,  I hear a higher, greater power (in heaven) unctioning us to humble ourselves, pray, seek God's face and turn away from our own wickedness!  And acknowledge HIM who is higher I or you!

Earlier, I'd shared:

Quote"Whenever "they" mock those who are called by His Name (His Children) with unjust murdering, a People shall eventually become indignant / intolerant and with divine direction, surround those who seek to destroy them. Yes! Just as Joshua (Yehoshu'a) and his people surrounded the enemy's camp ... and at the appointed time, began to sound the alarm with reverberations so powerful - so piercing, that even the coldest of heart ... must acquiesce to the unstoppable drumbeat of justice!!!

Again ... a movement for change / for justice has awakened - rising from a slumber of unrest!"

Get ready my brothers and my sisters, because whether we like it or we do not - in the near future, we as a People shall be forced to divinely galvanize, get along with & care for one another ... for the greater good and PEACEFULLY unite! 

... YES, it appears that we are way past weary, we remember who we were, we remember those incarcerated unjustly, we remember those of us cut down (slain) at the hands of hate!

We remember ... Trayvon Martin!!!


And above all, we remember a GOD - OUR GOD ... who is ever with us in our good & righteous doings & shall remain with us, covering us with HIS hands of protection!

Quote from: anotomy on September 19, 2008, 11:08:49 am
Everyone knows at least one divorce horror story, but we seldom hear about people who have established friendly post-divorce associations with each other. "Did you hear that Hugh and Liz are getting along well these days?" just isn't news. Armed with their version of divorce hell, the skeptics tell us it's impossible for a divorced couple to make peace and become friends. They outtalk the quiet and peaceful believers -- perhaps because people who are doing just fine don't feel the need to vent. "If every divorce were a 'War of the Roses', there would be blood on the streets.

Starting life agin after divorce is never easy. And I would love to know how things are now with you areyour girls. When we accept Christ as Lord & Saviour of our life we are covered by the blood of Christ and the blood saves us from the wrath of God. Live in peace in Christ.

Bit in response to the post above I wanted to say that my divorce was hell, but after a few years of peace (call it distance/space perhaps) and we were able to rebuild a friendship - a distant one at that. However if I was ever in need I knew i could call him and vice versa - and have tested that and it was fine. The good post-divorce stories are out there but who's gonna be shouting about it in Christian circles?

The Deep Waters Forum Administrator has arranged for her latest book, Cheer Up Your Wife: A DIY Biblical Guide to be made available on Valentine's Day for $7.69. This is nearly 50% of the purchase price and the minimum list price that Amazon.com will allow for this title. This offer will only be available if there are enough people interested in reserving a copy for purchase. If you would like to take advantage of this offer, please complete the Discount Survey on the Cheer Up Your Wife website. There is no charge for reserving a copy. A complimentary copy of Chapter 1, God's Dowry is attached. Thank you.

Cheer Up Your Wife: A DIY Biblical Guide by Aleathea Dupree

From the Author

It is said that we teach others how to treat us, but if you don't know how you should be treated, you are greatly disadvantaged. Women, married and unmarried, this book will show you how God expects you to be treated as a wife. If you're a single woman and someone expresses a serious interest in you as a potential wife, use this book as a tool to weed out those who would be willing to treat you the way God says you should be treated from those who would not. If you are a married woman, bless yourself and your husband with a copy as an investment in yourself as a wife, in him as a man and as an investment in the good success of your marriage.

If you are newlywed or engaged, this book contains invaluable pre- and post-marital counseling in less than a hundred pages of actual content that will equip you in building (or rebuilding) a solid foundation for a great marriage.

The Bible tells us to count the cost before we build. If you are a single man who plans to be married at some point, be wise and use this book to prepare for what God will require of you as a husband. If you are a man, married or single, this is the tool you need to fix or prevent the problem of an unhappy wife and to confidently carry out the biblical mandate, "cheer up your wife" (Deuteronomy 24:5).

The men are saying:

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"My husband starting reading this book and over  the time that he read the book, I saw a  transformation in how he thought about me and our  child. It is amazing how these words helped him  see some things that we had discussed at length  before."

"I purchased a copy of this book for myself and  as soon as the book was delivered my husband  immediately began reading. I immediately began to  see changes in him. It was amazing! My husband  had previously been married twice and really did  not understand how to be married and how to deal  with a wife. When he read this book it's like his  eyes were opened."

"I've never seen or heard of anyone approach  marriage issues from this perspective before!  It's fresh, insightful and very powerful. In less  than a hundred pages of actual content, every major marital issue has been thoroughly covered.  Each chapter is like a self-contained pre-marital or marital counseling session."

"I strongly encourage all of my married friends to order a book. It will truly change your marriage for the better. Even if you're not married, it will show you how to treat a woman if you're a man and what to look for in a man if you're a woman."

Singles are saying:

"Cheer Up Your Wife: A DIY Biblical Guide is good  advice for singles too. Aleathea Dupree gives  some keys to success in cultivating a core  foundation of roles in marriage. Learn and get  insight before marriage so that you can have a  great marriage."