Minister Had Affair with Married Man

[sagesong]

My very good girlfriend is just ended a year long affair with a married man.  She did not know that he was married.  He lied to her and spent so much time away from home that she had no way of knowing he was married.  She knew where he lived (or so she thought) and had been to his home.  She is an associated minister at her church. 

Please pray for her emotional healing.   She sounds too much to me like the other woman and not enough like a woman of God when she talks about their relationship. 

Even though she is doing what she feels is the noble thing and sending him back to his wife, she talks about their relationship like it was the one from God.  She says that in her spirit she knows that this is not the end for them.   On the day his wife came back home after leaving him for several month once she found out about the affair, he left his wife after church to visit my friend.  Although, she let him in and entertain him and his brother for hours, she doesn't think she did anything wrong. 

This woman has a powerful annointing on her life.  I know that this is a distraction set up by the enemy.  Stand with me in prayer that the plots and plans of the enemy do not prevail. 

[Gracious]

Hello Susta'- Sage,

How are you???  How are things going for you & yours???  I pray that things are well for you.

You know, this topic may have a "Woe" affect on a lot a folk' ... and it should!!!  Thank you for allowing the LORD to use you to share it ... Amen?

I'm led that we ALL have an internal magnet ... Amen?  And this "magnet" if you will, attracts to us, that which we feel we deserve.  Now, "our" interpretation of what it is that we feel we deserve is directly associated with ... a topic that has been THOROUGHLY addressed on this site ... "Self-Esteem"!!!

Now, since you did not ask for advise, you simply asked for prayer for your friend  ... THEN ... PRAYER is what you shall receive ...from me anyways... Amen?

Starting right now ...


From my heart to yours,


Gracious        

[1EagleSky]

Sagesong,

I understand how you feel and empathize with how your friend was deceived by this man. Something similar happened to a friend of mine, and she said that when she discovered the man was married, she told him that their relationship was over, but that they could still be friends. I told her, 'Oh no you don't! Friends, nothing! That man is married, he was dishonest with you, leave him alone! Change your phone number if you have to.'

The Bible promises that "no weapon formed against us shall prosper". Pray and thank God in advance that He will remove this man from her life permanently, and that He will convict her to sever all ties with this man.

Sadly, there are many involved in ministry who either are not born again at all, or who are so busy doing the work of God, that they don't take time to make time with God, and they easily end up being enticed into a lifestyle of sinful behavior.

It is my guesstimation that this man has done this more than once, and just hasn't been exposed by anyone or outright caught yet. He ought to know you can't pull the wool over God's eyes.

If, after numerous attempts to urge her to sever contact with this man have failed, you need to show tough love as a way of making her feel self-conscious about staying in contact with this man and his family. If she calls, don't answer the phone. If she stops by unexpectedly to visit, tell her you are busy with something else and don't have time for a visit.

For now, keep praying and thanking God in advance to remove this man from her life. Only resort to the tough love tactic mentioned above if a long span of time has passed and she still insists on staying in contact with this man.

I am so sorry to hear this. It is happening more and more nowadays. You have to pray for God's protection and discernment before you get involved in a romantic relationship with someone who seems to be or claims to be a believer.

[sagesong]

Gracious,

I'm doing well.  My daughter is growing fast.  She is 15 almost 16 months old.  Walking, trying to talk and learning to use the potty.  I don't know how things are going to end up with my husband and me.  Some days are better and some days are worst.   I don't know, because he doesn't know if he really wants to be a husband.  None-the-less, I am waiting to see the glory of God  -- whatever it might be.  I will do my part and honor and respect him.  What happens after that is not up to me. 

[Gracious]

Sagesong my friend,

Still & through it all with your husband ... YOU are the "SEE-ER" in your marriage.  It is YOU who have been GIFTED by GOD as HIS eyes.  We wives don't always look at this gift ... as-a-gift ... Amen? ... WE ... see it more as a burdensome quality.

I say this to you because I believe that you will hear me & know my meaning.

To say to you that YOU are the HEAD & NOT the TALE, when it comes to your marriage ... almost sounds alittle less than right ...  ESPECIALLY when it comes to marriage (meaning, some may confuse THOSE words with me insinuating that the wife should be the head  -  or "ahead" of the husband ... that's NOT what I believe). 

I'm simply encouraging you that you & your husband are NOW ... TWO - INDIVIDUALLY - WHOLE - ADULTS, enjoined together SUPERNATURALLY by the ALMIGHTY - as one!!! Only GOD can do THAT kind of melting together ... Amen?

As the "SEE-ER" of your marriage, it will seem almost effortless for you to sit back & have a "wait & see" mentality ... Amen?  However I encourage you to do more to encourage yourself & your situation, by setting the tone within yourself & your home ... by saying to yourself that GOD has granted YOU with the POWER of YOUR happiness!!!  Yes, you are enjoined with your husband spiritually & legally ... BUT ... GOD ... never requires us to SUFFER our husbands ... HE requires us to suffer with the Almighty H-I-M. 

Meaning, your help-meet isn't operating in a "act-right" spirit ... does that mean that your whole-day is ruined???   NOPE!!!  Susta' you know that when we get to meet the FATHER in heaven ...  our Holy Word says that WE must answer for OUR OWN sin ... NOT the sin of anyone else ... up to and including your husband!!!  Simply say to yourself, LORD - I give this situation to YOU, and YOU alone ... then go about doing whatever it is that you KNOW is righteous.

It is possible to have peace in the "fiery furnace" of an unhappy relationship season with your hubby. And that peace begins with YOU seeking it from JESUS through the aide of the Holy Ghost.

Sagesong (I luuuvv that name), I'm a susta' that tends to think radically ... Amen?    And I believe that EVERYTHING in this earthly realm is a result of God's Will (either Permissive - GOD allows it, or Divine - GOD ordains it).

If marrying your husband was against the WILL of GOD ... it simply would not / could not be!!!  Therefore, know that your union IS within HIS WILL!!! And you are strong enough to endure even this season of your marriage. ... DAY BY DAY ... moment by moment ... through HIS grace.


From my heart to yours,

Gracious

PS

WOW!!!  I'm sooooo HAPPY to hear about your little one ... time sure does fly by, doesn't it ... & she's walking too ... you are soooooooooo BLESSED!!!

[sagesong]

you & your husband are NOW ... TWO - INDIVIDUALLY - WHOLE - ADULTS, enjoined together SUPERNATURALLY by the ALMIGHTY - as one!!! Only GOD can do THAT kind of melting together ... Amen?

This brought to my mind the soldering or welding processes.  I know these basic truths.   Regardless of the type of soldering or welding used, you will need two clean objects.  To quote the how-to guide, soldering will not "take" to dirty parts.   Most of the methods recommended for cleaning the metal involves stripping away some of the original metal along with the dirt.

Next, you need to apply heat.  Then, time.  Too much time under direct heat will destroy the metal and weaking the joint.  Too little time and the bond will not hold.  Finally their is coverage.  You must apply solder or another substance that will seal and protect the joint.

Glory to God. 

Next, I do not believe in the "permissive will"  of God.  Either you are in the will of God or you are not.  In my understanding.  I will use my classroom as an example.  It is my "will" that students ask permission before they leave the room.  If you don't and just get up and leave, I will not chase after you.  I will not drag you back to class.  I will not force you to stay in your seat until you asked for permission.  This does not mean that by default you have my permission.

Since you do not have my permission and are operating outside of my "will", you will suffer the consequence of your decision. 

Now, I can't say my marriage is outside of the will of God.  I can say God does all things well.  This too is working for our good, because we love him. 

[Gracious]

It is NOW that I "truly" see you, and I shall continue to lift you & yours in my prayers.

[sagesong]

Gracious,

Uhm . . . ?  What does that mean?  You see me?

[Gracious]

Sagesong,

Simply ... more clearly - with a Spiritual eye ... I see you and am in prayer with/for you & yours.