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God is Faithful!

Started by knlowe, November 22, 2005, 11:12:58 am

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knlowe

This is my first post to the board but I was encouraged to share this testimony. So here goes  :).

In July of this year, I was diagnosed with Lupus. For those of you that don't know what that is it is basically a disease that attacks your body (every organ every cell from the inside out). It basically seeks to destroy you and your body... to put it very simply. Before I was diagnosed, I went through about 3 months not knowing what was exactly wrong with me. I was extremely tired, had a fever of over 100 degrees, I could barely walk, could barley brush my teeth (because the disease made movement very difficult), my face was swollen beyond recognition, my eyes were swollen shut, I had open sores all over my body that would bust open and bleed all over my clothes and whatever I touched, I lost about 25 pounds in a very short period of time, and I was constantly dehydrated. The pictures I could show you! It was really a site.



Anyway, the first doctor I went to told me I had rheumatoid arthritis and that I was anemic. For those that don't know that is the worst type of arthritis you can have and the one you get the least amount of relief from. Then after my symptoms got worse I ended up at a John's Hopkins clinic in Baltimore... long story short the Doctor took one look at me (she happened to specialize in Rheumatology) and asked me if I had been to the ER yet. I told her no and she said I was going today. She even wanted to put me in an ambulance. But I actually ended up driving myself to the hospital... probably not the best decision but Praise God it work out!



While at John's Hopkins they disgnosed me with Lupus and began treatment. After many pokes, prodding, blood drawn, visits from teams of doctors and that oh so delicious hospital food... I was released after about 4 days. While there my healing began to manifest and I knew this was the beginning of a GLORIOUS work. You see before all the diagnosis and manifested healing (which I am walking in this very day) God told me (after many hours of prayer and wondering what was going on with me) that I would live and not die and declare His works. He also told me that I was equipped for this... I was equipped to be victorious in this and I wouldn't be going through this if I wasn't. He also showed me that when I said I wanted him to use me, I didn't have any control of how he would. I am not saying that to scare anyone but you have to know and trust that God will never let anything harm you... because He loves you too much. Yes you will face trials and tribulations but you are well equipped to beat everything... that is why He sacrificed Himself on the cross. So that you will know that you have victory in ALL things!



Since getting out of the hospital, I have been blessed to see the goodness of God everyday in everyway. I am able to move about freely, my temp is back to normal, my face is back to its normal size, my eyes are not swollen, and basically everything that was wrong before is now right and better than before. I am even being treated by one of the foremost doctors regarding Lupus in the country at John's Hopkins. I know to some my 'new look' is not what you expected or remembered but I must tell you that I feel more beautiful now than I ever did before. You see I realized that beauty really only is skin deep and you can lose all that you thought you had in an instant. What will stand is your faith in the Most High God. It is not blind faith or faith based on something you heard from someone else... it is all about knowing for yourself without a shadow of doubt that God loves you and He alone will get you through it. Ever heard that saying you have to praise your way through the storm... well I am here to tell you that that is true. Even when I could barely open my eyes or move my body... I praised the Lord. Even when I felt like I wasn't going to make it that day... I praised the Lord. Even when I didn't understand what was going on .... I praised the Lord because I realized that He was my rock, my strength, and my salvation... and without him I was not going to make it.



So I stand before you troubled on every side but not distressed, perplexed but not in despair, persecuted but not forsaken, cast down but not destroyed. For which cause I faint not, but though the outward man may perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day (2 Corinthians 4: 8,9,16). If you would see me now, what you will see is a renewed woman. I am renewed in the Lord and that is what matters. So I say that all to say, I may look different to most on the outside but I am new to all on the inside and it is the greatest place to be. I have never been more happy and free. Free in Jesus! I no longer care much about how I look and if people stare because I know who I am in Christ. I am fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of Christ and after His likeness. I am loved by God unconditionally and He is my shield and my fortress. God is Awesome!!! And real. PRAISE THE LORD! HALLEUIAH!



As a result of the Lupus my face was attacked greatly... hence the discoloration and loss of hair... I lost over 60% of my hair that I use to so meticulously fuss over... that is the reason for my wraps. But Praise the Lord it is now growing back better than before and I fully expect to walk around very shortly with a full head of hair and skin more beautiful than before. I have since gained all my weight back... which I am not sure is a good thing LOL... but I plan to lose it again in a more healthier fashion. Please keep me in prayer about that  LOL.



I know this is long but I really just wanted to share with you the goodness of the Lord. You see, God wants to show Himself in all of us. When you testify of the goodness of the Lord you are bragging and boasting on Him not to make Him feel good but to allow Him to show you (and those around you) just how much He cares for you and wants you to walk in total victory. This diagnosis is not to have anyone feel bad for me or cry over any of it... it is simply to testify of how wonderful God is and how strong and mighty He is in my life. I must tell you, if I didn't have God in my life as strongly as I do I believe I would have died... yes it was that serious. BUT GOD! He saw fit to place His loving arms around me and carry me to healing. This is not something that is special only to me but is there for anyone who is willing to trust God in whatever you are dealing with. He wants us all to succeed, to trust him, to love Him, to worship Him, and to obey Him. If you are facing ANY challenge today (health, finances, career decision, family, or whatever) here is the formula for your victory... Seek the Lord first, listen to what He tells you, and obey what He says. No compromises on what He tells you...just do it...even if it doesn't make sense. The truth of the matter is in that every thing that He tells you to do that doesn't make sense that is where your victory will come. See the book of Joshua in the old testament or consult the story of Abraham in Genesis. Both of these men stepped out on faith at what the Lord God Almighty told them and they were victorious in what they put their hands to. If that is too far fetched for you, look at me. He told me to just praise and worship him. He told me that my defeat would be in my silence. And I tell you what as God is my witness EVERY time I tell people of the goodness of the Lord in my life, my face improves and something else gets better. My victory and yours is in the praise. Don't let your defeat come because you didn't want to open your mouth and Praise the Lord. He is wanting to show up strong for you (2 Chronicles 16:9) and one way to get his attention is to praise him consistently regardless of how you feel and to worship him in spirit and in truth.



I want to thank everyone for their concern and prayers....believe me it is a blessing to me. But please if you are going to pray don't ask God for my healing... I am already healed... just thank him that my healing is manifested in the earth. And please don't refer to me as being sick... I am well and ALL IS WELL. I have been DIAGNOSISED with Lupus ...I don't say I HAVE IT because I refuse to take possession of this disease. I will fight against it because I fully believe that I am already healed and I will surprise you and the doctors with my healing. I am believing God for 100% eradication of this disease out of my body. I stand on His promise that by His stripes that He endured I am healed and the gates of hell will not prevail against me. So if you are going to stand with me, stand in agreement with this. And speak life... into my life and in those around you.



Thank you for taking the time to read this. I pray this was a blessing to you and that God spoke to you about your situation through the words written here. God is Sovereign and I trust in Him with all my heart and I lean not to my own understanding and in all my ways I will acknowledge Him for He will direct my path (proverbs 3:5-6). Won't you trust him too???... He is waiting to do exceedingly abundantly above all that you ask or think according to the power that works in you (Ephesians 3:20).

Know that God Loves and yearns for you more than anyone you possibly know. His love for you is so great that you would not even be able to comprehend it. Give Him a chance to show it to you... it will blow your mind.