When you've done everything wrong

[1EagleSky]

How do you not 'beat yourself up' in situations where you were impatient and did not trust God to bring a relationship to pass, or show you if having a relationship with a certain person was indeed His will,  but took matters in your own hands? Also, as a result of being impatient, does it always mean the relationship will not come to fruition, or that you will go through a "wilderness experience" that could have been avoided had you been patient, trusted and waited on God in the 1st place?

[David Dupree]

Hi 1Eagle,

Actually beating yourself up is not a bad thing--at least for a while.  One factor lacking with most people who "fall" into sin is contrition.  True contrition is from being godly sorry for your slip/mistake/bad decision.  But once you have experienced your contrite sorrow, the next step is for it to compel/propel you into steps to avoid such a mishap again.  Further, you have to be able to accept and suffer the consequences.  They are coming whether you accept them or not. 

Sure, sin has consequences that sometimes are not avoidable or that are sometimes postponed for the sovereign Will of God to manifest.  Does it mean that you totally have blown the intended relationship?  Not necessarily. 
But just be patient next time.  If you are experiencing trouble with your wait, may I suggest an excellent resource for you, Though the Vision Tarry - Waiting for My Promised Mate.  You can order it at www.dathea.com/vision.  By the way, this book was written by our Forum Administrator.   

As Jesus said when He healed them, "go your way and sin no more."  After you have beat yourself up, do not allow the enemy to step in and keep you beating yourself up.  There is a fine line between the two and you have to discern where it is.  But the enemy wants to keep you mourning your failure instead of dusting yourself off and continuing to live.  Yes, just because you may be experiencing human consequences does not mean that you need to continue beating yourself up.  For example, if you are requested to relinquish an auxiliary position for a while does not mean that you need to wallow in the mud that long. After the "prodigal" son came to himself, he arose and got out of the mud and went to his father. You may still experience consequences-especially the 18 year long type-but don't punish yourself.  Do not allow the enemy or your conscience to make you unforgive yourself when God forgives you. 

dd

[tippieangel]

I'm in that boat too. So, I just keep reminding myself that Jesus was sitting on a mountain Praying when he knew his disciples were struggling at the oars against the wind but he didn't just stand up and say "hey over here remember me get a grip I'm still here." Nope He waited till it was time to come see about them and when He came He came WALKING ON WATER. (aka he'll show up and show out in your situation.)But they almost missed it because of fear. I use this passage in Mark6:45-51 because Jesus sent his disciples ahead of him and then he didn't come to them till the fourth watch. Some time Jesus will show you some things and tell you now go ahead.Where we mess up is that we think we have to manipulate the situatuion or figure out what to do next. But we don't. Jesus is sitting on the mountain praying and he's got it ALL work out all we have to do is Remember he's there and when it's time he'll Walk across the water and get in the boat with us! Even if you tried to do it your way and of course it didn't work doesnt mean that Jesus isn't still praying and watching from the mountain you just got to not stop rolling and DON'T be AFraid when he starts to walk by. I hope that made sense it's just a little "tippieology"

[Monica Brown]

Hello Sis,
First of all beating yourself up is not the answer. WHY? Romans 8:1 puts it like this, "There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit" Also 1 John 1:9 says, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and cleanse us from all sin." Nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes. Use this as a learning tool and move forward. Only God knows what road you will go down from the results of not waiting. Just pray, ask for his forgiveness, forgive yourself, and move forward in the things of God.
God will place it in the sea of forgetfulness and so should you. Maybe it will work and maybe it won't, and if it does not that means God has someone MUCH better for you. Only time will tell, so get in his presence and find out.

God Bless,
Evangelist MB
www.monicabrownministries.com